No matter what your inner voice screams, you are amazing.
Sometimes resiliency is a, 'fake it until you make it,' scheme, and sometimes you have to admit that you need help, because faking it simply isn't working.
Remember, despite your perhaps thinking you've already dealt with, processed, gotten past or through something, the universe has a way of bringing that old crap up again to remind you of a few things:
Firstly, that you shouldn't forget the lesson you learned through the hardship.
Secondly, there may be something you're missing that you need to deal with.
Thirdly, maybe things feel too familiar for a reason, and that's something to be aware of and keep in mind.
I've been struggling with a few things lately, that I truly thought I would never have to deal with again. In addition to that difficulty, I have quite recently had a new negative pattern pop up its nasty little head.
I did something that I don't often do: I asked for help and support. I admitted that I was not okay, that I could not handle my situation without help, and that I needed more support than I was currently receiving.
Sometimes keeping things to yourself is not the way to go.
Having said the above, if you're struggling with anxiety, depression, or other difficulties, asking for help can feel like an impossible task.
I am very lucky to have people in my life who love me enough to comprehend that when I'm emotionally or physically struggling or exhausted, that I need the reassurance that the person checking in, or asking how I am, really and truly wants to know my answer.
My partner understands this, and will press me to divulge all information and encourage me in a supporting and sustaining manner. If I am unable to deal with something, he helps me take the first steps.
Not everyone has someone in their life who is able to do that.
If you see someone struggling, or having a difficult moment, ASK THEM if they need assistance -- be it a close friend, an acquaintance or a stranger.
The number of times I have checked in with someone crying, or downcast --- and I'm talking about strangers on the street or outside my normal circle of friends and acquaintances, is TOO MANY to count.
Sometimes, all a person needs is a hearty meal to feel okay again, sometimes it's a hotline referral, or a simple handshake.
Sometimes it's a greeting, a smile, a cookie and an, "I see you and acknowledge your pain and your existence."
I try to carry snacks in my car, not just for myself (HANGRY is not a laughing matter, and low blood sugar or hypoglycemia can be scary) but for the homeless too, or anyone really, who could use a small act of kindness to remember that they're not alone, if only for a moment.
I'm rambling today, but my point is: ASK for help if you can, and try and have compassion enough to realize that sometimes it's not possible. Sometimes you have to remember when you yourself ARE OKAY, that someone else isn't, and they need you to instigate.
For anyone struggling with a longer, deeper, or more inescapable issue, please know that I send you love and support. Life isn't easy, and whatever you're dealing with, I wish I could take your pain and suffering away.
For now, I want you all to know that I am doing very well. My issue was quickly resolved before it became a permanent or much more scary fixture in my life, because I had the self-awareness to ask for the help I realized I needed, immediately. While I am still staying aware of my self-care patterns, and checking in with my center every day, I remain vigilant in my compassion and message of love and light.
Please, take care of yourselves, and if you can't, I hope someone sees you and is able to reach out.
